My life on a bolt...

Just sharing cool fabric that came today......Isn't this great??

After my Melanoma surgery on Wednesday, 

I will not be able to go to my water aerobics for 6 weeks.

Too bad...huh?  Cuz this fabric is awesome.

Here we have my love's dress shirt number six...

...all cut up and paired with ice cream to celebrate the good times.

Very therapeutic.

Quilting is saving my life...again...and again...

Little ones are asleep..Evan feels empowered that he is ten..so can stay up forever playing with his birthday Legos and listening to his I-pod.

Stephanie has gone home.  I hope she is not tired of my crying.

..or maybe she is tired of washing and folding my new fabric..

Evan got his granddaddy's laptop for his birthday yesterday. Grandma fixed the case...

Emily had the case from when she auditioned at Julliard 10  years ago..

.Never waste a thing, they say.

I just glued and sewed right over that label to make a new one!!!

And just so you know who is in charge here..

.I wish I had the answers now that I had at age 6..

I would definitely have more peace. Nothing like a know-it-all

My mother's SMASHED TOMATO

My mother wrote this poem as Parkinson's disease started to steal her fingers' ability to use the computer keyboard.  She kept writing poetry, but with much more difficulty. 

 Eventually, her keen mind was able to write them in her head and dictate them to friends. 

 Mom...if you had only known how much I would come to understand this poem..

.Thank you.

A SMASHED TOMATO

Like a smashed tomato, so true

sqooshy red eyes and a nose full of goo

This is my pity party

and I'm not inviting you.

frustrated, infuriated,

I know the reason why

unbidden grief engulfs

my soul

all I do is cry

sorry not returning calls:

busy drying my eyes

forgive my self-indulgence-

guess it was no surprise

I have not been myself these days

please let me make amends

I love you lots,you know I do

I hope we still are friends!

Alice Franzen Clemons Burt 2011

NOW...I need to wright a poem about justification....ha ha.but I am not a poet...

For a fact, I know that a grief therapist would charge $90 for 45 minutes of time.

So, now about....buying fabric online!!!!

So therapeutic in several ways:.

+.It is cost effective as therapy

+It brings hours of pleasure as one peruses the sale choices online.

+ It brings wonderful times as one eliminates the once thought lovely choices to buy only the dearest ones.

+It affords one the pleasure of receiving a  package of nothing but joy in the mail.

+Washing, folding and caressing the fabric brings peace.

+Looking at it and loving it brings nothing but delight.

+It builds muscle (in the PayPal finger, that is..)

+Clearly buying fabric online is healing behavior...

So what do you think. My friends????  Let me know...

                   I so miss my mornings of finding my fabric shop links on my phone...so so miss it. 

A few fly bites cannot stop a spirited horse. MARK TWAIN

This post is just about stuff...so..
Happy Thanksgiving Muggs...

I have eight online fabric shops sending me emails..Deal of the Day, etc....
  Today I had to unsubscribe to 7 because I have had absolutely no control over myself..
 Shopping therapy is helpful..but does not fix my pain...sigh.
I did sneak in Hancock of Paducah..I just couldn't let her go.

Humans of New York

"When my husband was dying, I said: 'Moe, how am I supposed to live without you?' He told me: 'Take the love you have for me and spread it around.'"

Thank you Mother for teaching me this!!

and then there is...
Inspiration from Marc and Angel Hack

Hello...my mantra....lol


A finish..bad pix for some bright sun reason..ugh...too lazy to re-do.

 Backing...better...ho hum at least it is done..

And so it goes..up and down and all around.  Even if I cannot write the thank you notes and I cannot email blog comment thank yous and I cannot...cannot...no energy..no focus...
I still am grateful for you all.
xxoo

Bryan's Style...Walking the Dog

Yesterday was Tuesday morning...again...10 weeks a widow.

I am still numb and befuddled.  I do not like Tuesday mornings anymore. 

I am so grateful for the family and friends who have been here for us..the children and me...

 through thick and thin riding the waves... often scary.

They expect nothing and give everything.

Then I saw Bryan and I shaped up
Walking the Dog

Walking the dog may seem like a chore to everyone else but to Bryan Anderson, it's a chance to zoom 20 miles per hour on his skateboard.
Posted by We Are The Mighty on Tuesday, June 23, 2015

Enjoying the Circus

My dear sweet 10 year old Evan.  I apologize.  I know that you love to wind bobbins. 

 You know that I hate to wind bobbins.

You are away for the weekend. I needed a white bobbin.  I took your newly wound one on your new machine.  I will make it up to you.  You are sooo great at winding bobbins. 

 I love you.

I love your new little sewing station with your own machine!!

I love to spray baste small quilts.  The best thing about it is that if you make a mistake..Just lift it up and start again...no unpinning required.  IMHO, the top needs to be basted first and then trimmed before the backing.

Of course in my state of mind, I did the opposite...easy peasy to undo:)

 This little scrap baby quilt was so much more fun than the original.  Though, I still seem to be the master of the wobbly binding.  My lazy self this time.  I did not leave enough for self binding and did it anyway.

 The back was totally fun to make.

Will try to keep on keeping on with this message I have tried to live by.. 

 Especially the one about spending money on things you love...

eg...you know what!!!...(fabric!!!)

Mother could have written this, and we always tried to live it..Thanks Ma.

Totally good day today...sleeping, having lunch out, sewing.
...... and watching Netflex..Grace and Frankie:)
If I only had a few months to live..what would I want to do???
Exactly what I am doing now.
Sewing, eating lunch with friends and raising my grands..
Mr. O'Quilts felt the same about his life...doing just what he had been doing.
Blessings.  Life is good.
Lucky me
xxoo

The Home of the Brave

When the dermatologist, himself, called this afternoon, I knew that the news was not good.
Should I sell this old scary house of mine to find the home of the brave..
...or should I just remodel???

So how did this intelligent woman with advanced degrees handle the unpleasant news??
Well...She got onto Sew me a Song Etsy shop and bought Japanese fabric.
And, she ate peanut M&Ms for lunch.
Then, she sewed.
When I asked my 10 year old grandson the other day...why he was acting crazy.
..He answered because it is a crazy life...Amen...wise at 10.
Here we have crazy odd left over blocks made into a baby top.

 And, here we have Mr.O'Quilt's shirt paired with one of my favorite prints.
Again...a crazy combination.
My love used to say, use your favorites now, or I will call Goodwill when you die.
I will tell them to come and get your favorites because you hoarded them.

I am looking for the home of the brave...because it certainly is not here.

The big fat cyst just removed last week is nothing but a forgotten pain.

The new crazy mole of 3 weeks is Melanoma.

Good thing that I have no inclination to off myself.
Good thing that the big fat cyst appeared.

Now, this is too much.  Didn't I say I already had too much??

Guess no one was listening.

July 1..I get to have a big chunk of my shoulder removed.

Hopefully that is the end of it..Doc says it has not spread yet....

But.....
And, no water aerobics all summer.
And, I cannot find my small red elephant fabric.

Wandering Ways

This evening's quilting will feature a birthday party for our Margaret..

.She turns 98..We never turn down a chance for a party, especially for Margaret.

Did you know that eating chocolate will help you live that long???  I did....

I made my homemade fudge and wrapped it in this cool coffee fabric.
Margaret loves her coffee

 And...an Irish surprise......

Mr. O'Quilt's family...with all their good qualities...are a bit on the willful side.

It is their only weakness...

Here is his baby sister...not a sewing machine in her house.

There is not a little one,not a big one and just plain none at all....yet!

But, looky. looky....Here she is holding a Quilt magazine!!!!

Sigh, my heart beats wildly...with thrill and excitement...You give me hope Ita!!!

Today

I walk around my house doing nothing.  Taking naps and looking at my fabric.

Yesterday I spent time in line at Social Security trying to settle estate business..so there will be some income.

And, I put Netflix in my name.  Every time the children turn on Netflix, it said,
 "Welcome Fintan".

I could not stand it.  It is the little things.

We are suffering through unusual weather here in Charlotte...99 to 100 degrees F...everyday and no rain.

Grateful for indoor summer camp this week for the kids,

Grateful for indoor quilting room..... cool for my wandering.

Grateful, despite my wandering.

Hocus Pocus, Mumbo Jumbo

A top of a castle at sunset in Lisbon, Portugal,

 my only daughter got engaged.

Magic!!

Great Aunt Alma was married to a miser...or how the story goes.

The minute he died...about...she headed to the diamond shop in downtown Boston and bought herself a one carat diamond ring.

When she died, she willed the ring to my grandmother, Edith.

My grandmother gave the ring eventually to my mother who was not a ring person but a poet.

My mother gave the diamond to me, her eldest daughter.

Five generations later, my dear girl is wearing the same stone.

The A-Ok was given by Daddy before he died..

Love and life continue.

It is all meant to be.

Flight

 Somewhere a journey begins at

the end of the worldly existence we know.

Somewhere a path stretches over the stars

 and rivers of memories flow.

Somewhere a silence is heard far away

and the brightness of day fills the night.

Where the trials of life are resolved into peace

 when a soul finds its way to the light.
                                                     
                                            author unknown

Hyperbole, or not

Well...I am so not Van Gogh or Edgar Allen Poe....Although we just might have craziness in common, they were able to put their angst into creativity while I can not.
It is pre-cuts for this wounded soul...blah blah blah.
Guess I will save the top for some upcoming non quilting baby.

Next, I took out these to work on, but there were very few so I put them back in the box and took a nap.

Hysterics

Yesterday morning I had an appointment with Social Security re: the death thing.

Then I was off to the dermatologist for two biopsies:

A ruptured cyst and a black creepy mole...both of which came in the last month.

Whatever......

I bought five quilting magazines and am just wandering around the house.
Plain done in..

I am emotionally and mentally and physically exhausted.
 Good post on grief today by
Made by a Brunette
And now a call from Aunt Brandy, that Dylan ate a berry he found on the trampoline that was in bird poop?????????????
Just take me away................

O'Quilt Fun

Today..

A two hour nap in complete silence...wonderful

Then playing with some sale blocks from awhile ago.
Must be mindless play today.

Tuesday night's relaxation:

Dylan getting off the school bus and being bitten by a bee.

Dylan swelling up and screaming.

Grandma taking him to the Urgent Care. Anaphylaxis.!!!!!

The Urgent Care calling an ambulance to take him downtown to the children's hospital.

Here he is. 

 Old grandma frets.  Five year old Dylan cannot wait for the ambulance ride...alone.

 Dylan watches movies while under observation at the ER..

Grandma has had quite enough, thank you.

Then, the other two children freak out since it has not been that long since Granddaddy went off in an ambulance...etc and then went off for good..

.So I had to get them all from school..sigh..

 Since when is 10 years old adolescent???

Dylan of course, had to stay home from school...so we went to the J to learn Mitzvah. 

(always now accompanied by an epi pen...grrr)

Here he is with the basket of flower pens to pass around.

Still charming, although itchy.

Tomorrow I have an appt for a nasty procedure at the dermatologist...just ugh.

I totally need a vacation.

Hello Silence, my old friend..

I had my group over as usual on Wednesday night.  I so needed help with this top.  There was one block that was driving me nuts..I felt that I had to take it apart and switch it around due to value.

Ten women looked to find the mistake.  Ten women chose 10 different blocks that they thought were causing the problem...Lordy!!!

The photo showed no problem at all...so I am leaving it.

I need two more rows for this quilt top..Putting it away for a rainy day!

Great Aunt Carl in Greenville, Alabama gave me a cutting of her Gardenia bush many moons ago.

She died last year on my mother's birthday.

She would be thrilled to see how that one rooting has make a huge tree all in bloom here.

A little family fun...little kids in their pool. 

 Three kids????

Thank you soo soo much Aunt Brandy for taking the three children today for the weekend.

My three and your three make six..You are a saint.

The sound of silence roars its relaxation!!!

I have switched from M&Ms to Oreos

Voila, the latest block for Muggs' beach quilt...I only have one more..but because I am poor in math, I really only have two more..

 Did I mention that each dress shirt makes 5 of these 16 patch blocks???

This coral color was my favorite on my man.

It went very nice with his deep blue eyes and his black black hair...I mean, his grey, grey hair...

OK, already...his white, white hair!!!

Here we have versions of the Swedish black arm bands worn for grief.

Yesterday's version...and...

Since I am of Swedish descent...Here is my version.

All my friends did was laugh....

Oh, Lord..won't you buy me a.....

115 ways to help your grief...I think??

Thank you Katie for the awesome napkins we used tonight.

Thank you Muggs for the lanyards to hold the children's library cards...I can be so so organized...

With..a little help from my friends.

Just saving the drama for the next post...I have learned...Oh, yes I have,

That 10 o'clock at night is the wrong time for drama.

xxoo

Just in from the burial mass in Ireland...

So now the information in...400  people at the mass in Charlotte and 500 people at the mass in Ireland.

The family church, Kinvara, Co. Galway

 The family plot

 The family priests

The family musicians

 

I love them all.

Goodbye my love...goodbye

Smack in the middle of just a great day!

My grandmother was a gardener.  My husband was a gardener.
Today was a day of energy and hope.
 Hope started, the other week with the UFO group giving me two Azaleas and a beautiful bird bath...
.I realized then, that possibilities abound...and...
I just maybe might be able to have a garden again.

I love my daughter-in-law.Today it is her visitation.
Here are the two waiting for their mother on the front lawn  Grateful to have a huge yard..

The girl said that she had never gardened before...the kids will teach her..the three did a great job!

 The newest in fashion...the worm bracelet!!

Just doing the funeral think.
The text of Obama's eulogy for Beau Biden

 400 people came to the funeral of my dear man here in Charlotte.

Yesterday, hundreds more came from all over Ireland and England to his burial mass in Ireland.

It meant so so much.

The time that people took from their soccer games and their grocery shopping and more..
.putting aside their own fears to support us...

It meant love, it meant respect, it meant sacrifice to support our loss.

I am so grateful .
Did I mention that it was a good and grateful day today???
xxxooo for all my blogging and other friends.
Thank you for forgiving me for not responding to your comments that mean so much.
Thank you for forgiving me in not getting out thank you cards.
xxoo

Conservative marries Funky

My gut tightens with grief as my dear man's ashes are buried today in a family plot in Ireland.

I am confused.  The past 22 months have become 22 seconds in my mind.

What happened?

I need help.  I do not want help.
I want to be left alone, I hate to be left alone.
I am trying to feel the desolation, I fear and run from the desolation.
I want to throw up.
And so it goes.

Last night I put myself to work.  I made blocks from his second shirt.

Conservative marries funky.

And has a forever love affair.

Just Riding Random

The pure joy of being six...a lost tooth in an apple...and dreams of the tooth fairy.!!!

 Their teacher potholders are done..and now on the way to Karate.

Keeping up our morals and spirits is Margaret who posts these things on Facebook..

Nothing can dim the light which shines from within.”

―Maya Angelou

and then....
I am so working on this one..

So sad today...missing the big outing to Belmont with my friends.  I am just too weak from my asthmatic bronchitis and need to rest by my breathing machine.
Oh, well...better safe than sorry.  I am so exhausted and I do not want to end up in hospital.
My sister brought the treats (fabric of course) over after..and took the kids to Karate.

Despite my blah blah...Evan managed to get his grandmother to help him with the end of school thank you present for his tutor...a pillowcase with golf fabric.
And, Evan managed to get his crabby grandma to let him stay up late to watch season 3,episode 4 of the Great British Sewing Bee on Granddaddy's I-Pad.

Still.....
"I see your face in every flower,
your eyes in stars above,
it's just the thought of you,
the very thought of you,
my love......."

Seven weeks a widow.