Monday, August 31, 2015

From the White Horse on the Merry-Go-Round

My sister is losing her house and has 24 days to be far, she has no place to go.
All the things that we split from my grandmother's death and from my mother's death are coming to my house. My grandmother's sister Alma made this.
.Alma died 60 some years ago.
I promised my grandmother I would restore it, but I gave it to my sister to restore instead.

This is a table cloth from our house growing up...maybe 45 years old.
I cut out the bad and was saving it to make an apron but gave it to my sister.
I can get rid of nothing..nothing at all.
Mud brain thinks that things bring security.
Here is my cutting table.  I have two big tubs of scraps..
Somehow more ended up on my cutting table.
Along with a horse I made from an abandoned quilt.... for my baby daughter.
My daughter is 32 now.
 I do not have enough yellows, so I cut up a shirt of Dylan's
Today: Eye can see.
Lunch with friend.
Evan to his therapist
Michael's Craft Store with ACMoore 60% off coupon
500 new pins...
And tonight I re-read this book: Widow book number 7 and I  had read it 10 years ago.
It is now going to the library.
Information is power...and control...??????
Maybe I had better keep reading??
Things I am reminded of today:
No matter how much you love an addict, they still lie and use drugs.
My Mr. O'Quilts is not coming back.
I too will die someday..
Dylan is not a girl.  Second week of Kindergarten, he came home with a black mark in  behavior.
According to Dylan...he only colored on someone's shirt. 
 And, he only touched someone with scissors...but they were closed....
Chocolate is gone, so I had popcorn...not as good.
Red wine is gone, so I had white...not as good.
I am not as young as I was and it ain't going to change,
.... no matter how many times I ask Santa.

dead wood in the desert
driftwood on the strand
dreams and dunes together
lost in sifting sand.
                                              Alice Franzen Clemons Burt


IHaveANotion ~ Kelly Jackson said...

Oh yes, I have those piles of family fabrics and my mothers shirts too....wonder if they will ever get made into anything?

I admire your ability to keep writing through all of this....


Bridget said...

Your title for this post is definitely spot on--up and down. Your body and brain need their naps, methinks. Thank God that school has started! Just remind yourself that you are doing your best.

We are traveling for the next three weeks...I am on my way to Jean Wells' class at the Madeline Island School for the Arts and hope to learn lots from one of my quilt heroes. I left the sewing room a disaster, and the very organized neighbor who is coming to feed the cat will probably wonder how I even function.

You are functioning and that's what counts. The kids are getting therapy for their rough times and you are giving yourself therapy reading your widow books and sewing stuff. If you need more than that, you will know.

Rachaeldaisy said...

Some days seem like there is a tonne of stuff on your plate to deal with, remember that other days are better. I'm sending a wave of hugs.