Happiness Is.....

An awesome package from Texas for the kiddos...xxoo Thank you Laurel!!

 Making blocks from my dear man's shirts. 

He always looked so handsome in this plaid shirt.

When I told my mother that Mr.O'Quilts got more handsome every day,

she said...

.Love is blind...

Jeeze..giving MILs a bad name!!!! 

Mother....!!!!

 And pulling some fabric for a WIP

For me the whole purpose of the fabric choices for this group quilt

 was working with shot cotton.

Starching it helps, so wobbly..but so worth it.

Looks like my funky yellow is all missing in action.:)

I am still searching the stash for it.

As the story goes....

Yitshak Perlman was about to perform when he broke a string.

The orchestra went on without him.

Soon, he played to great applause on the three strings left..

When questioned as to how he did it...He replied,

"My task is to make music with what remains".

Julie Ciscero adds

Complete the song left for us to sing

Transcend the loss

Play it out with heart and soul and might

With all the remaining strength within us.

Thank you all for the comments and emails and continued support as I carry on

without my love.

xxoo

Muggs' Ship Blocks...awaiting their lattice...hmmm

Muggs' boat blocks for her beach house quilt.

Looking for lattice.

Thinking orange... or yellow:)  Just thinking...Others are thinking black...me no like..too gloomy.

Muggs wants to put them in the order of holidays..I want to put them in order of value.

Muggs will make the ultimate decision tomorrow night. 

What do you think??.

How do I decide when to go to bed?

Let's see...

When I am hysterical?
When I am eating too many Oreos?

When I am furious that these children's formative years were so unstable to leave lasting pain?

When despair is upon me without my dear man?

When it is 11pm???

Children were so naughty tonight..

They have sad hearts..

Oh...this is the time for bed...Even I know it now.

xxoo

Gifting and the Grief

The lawn cutter's daughter's doll quilt is finished.
 Grateful.
. Here...preparation..

Here... done..with a "Frozen" backing...

Tuesday, 8:30 am....15 weeks a widow.
 I hate Tuesdays.
 Approaching four months when folks tend to think you should be getting better..
In reality, you are no longer in shock and you are just starting to grieve...feeling worse.

To Those Who Mourn

By CE Leadbeater

For that is the real truth

Man is a soul and has a body.

The body is not the man

It is only the clothing of the man.

What you call death is the laying aside

Of a worn out garment.

and it is no more the end of the man

than it is the end of you

when you remove your coat.

Therefore, you have not lost your friend;

You have only lost sight of the cloak

in which you were accustomed to see him.

The cloak is gone

but the man who wore it is not;

Surely it is the man that you love

and not the garment.

My daughter-in-law came to visit her children.  They do not understand much about all this.
They are so young.
 She came with big smiles, all tanned from a beach weekend.
They do not understand why she did not take them.
They are trying to understand.
They have stopped crying on the outside for her.
They grieve silently.
I grieve too.

Sometimes it is a hard luck life.

Sewing is the Charm

My sister's neighbor fixed my lawnmower...parts and labor...no charge.
She offered that I make his nine year old daughter a quilt for her doll.
I hope that a nine year old still has dolls...He said she would love it..so I started it tonight.
I have tons and tons of charms cut from scraps of other project..TBTG

Since the children are asleep, this was relaxing.
I did it instead of reading Widow book number 6 or a book on ALS..
Good choice, Diane..

I am taking grief notes from the books I read.

"My grief lies all within, and these external
manners of laments are
Merely shadows to the unseen grief that swells
with silence in the tortured soul"
William Shakespeare

"I measure every grief I meet with narrow probing eyes.
I wonder if it weighs like mine.
Or has an easier size."
Emily Dickinson

Then these great music videos...love!

To Sail the Sea....by the Figs
One of the girls killed in the movie theater was part of this group.  They wrote the song for her.

Playing for a change
World wide music..just wonderful

A Bowl, a Roll and a Preview

A Happy Birthday present for MP...hope you enjoy..

I made the Small basket from a tute from the Grafty Gemini to hold some binding clips

 Easy peasy and mucho fun. Gotta use Irish fabric for MP, you know...

Tonight I put together the long lost blocks from our MQG..Borders later...
like much later...bored and off to something else...lol


Here are the Block in the Box instructions...
I did it with two groups.
2013 Block in a Box Exchange (Lake Norman Quilters)
 “Block in a Box” exchange.  Each participant chooses their fabrics and the block they want to make early in the year, then they make that block out of their fabrics.  All the while keeping their choice of block secret from others.  Once their block is made, they put their fabrics into a box and pass it to the next person in the lineup and receive a box of fabrics from the person before them in the lineup.  Each month you pass and receive from the same person, but work on a different member’s fabrics, making your choice of block.  Yes, for this project the block you choose to make should be one you’ll enjoy making multiple times during the year. At the end of the year the boxes are all passed back to their original owners, and at the same meeting the blocks are distributed to their owners.  You go home with blocks to make a sampler (or other style) quilt, all done in your fabrics by multiple guild members!

There is more:  I won a giveaway from  Barbara Brackman
The Morris Jewels....a jelly roll...I am thrilled

Then there was the Daddy visit.
Evan wanted his hair like his father..so here we go.
Daddy was in good shape this visit, the children were thrilled.

Where this white comes from no one knows...grrrr

The Faust Groupies

We fabric addicts struck gold at Faust Thursday..10 women searching for the best...

So exhausted and ready for lunch...what better way to spend a day.
 Treasure hunting at $2.50 a pound.
Faust is a wholesale fabric store in Kings Mountain, North Carolina.

Look at some of the loot that came from that pile...ha ha..so much fun.
Also got Insul-Brite and 505 spray basting for 50% off...

Need has nothing to do with desire....Unfortunately money does!!!!
The Juki......hmmmm
Juki review by Crafty Gemini

Evan is such a dear...at 10 years old we can hang out together.
 Last night we watched the coverage of Hurricane Andrew from 1992.
  Mr.O'Quilts and our family lived through the storm, lying in the hallway, covered with a mattress.
Our house was 5 minutes from the National Hurricane Center where this video came from..
Lucky us survived with only broken windows and missing trees.
Emily was sorting through the VHS tapes when we came upon this one..

The three of them are growing up....I love them so.

Pumpkin misses my dear man too...We have decided to sew together!!!
Himself would have been pleased.

Just Go Sew

Today a top finished from orphan blocks and backing cut...adorable owls from IKEA

 Guess what I found in my messy sewing room...way after a year...
My block exchange from the Charlotte Modern Quilt Guild.
 I am sure that they were due forever ago.
Grateful I found them at all.
I have the blocks now on the design wall trying to balance value...hmmm a bit on the busy side.

 One beautiful conniver got a new backpack for school.  How could anyone resist??

And boy is she a worker...cleaning up sticks for the lawn mowing experience.

Voila...my sister to the rescue once again...Ten year old Evan's first lawn cutting experience.

I love this link....

Sooo fun from Melly Sews..especially the fabric pix

Three months a widow and grief is getting worse..
I.guess I am out of the shock stage now...ugh and ugh again.

When grief and the unfairness of life socks it to me...I sew for myself and give to others....

It calms my sea...for awhile.
Thank you for friends and family for lifting me up and holding me tight.
And of course for the comfort of all our dogs and cats.
I promised my dear man that I would carry on.
Maybe now is the time for Rachel's Survival Kit chocolate from Australia!!!!

One More Very Good Day

Evan and I would like to share with you what we consider one of the important things in life.

We are sampling the Australian chocolate.. as he just finished practicing his keyboarding lesson and I am just home from my widow support group...yum!!

Voila...what a weekend rest can do for the soul:

Someone good told me today that I am always in Triage mode around here.

So...London Olympics top finished....long time coming..

The problem with a date on a quilt is that everyone knows what you have not been doing.

 London Olympics back finished....So hoping to get it basted on Wednesday night.

Thank you Marie for fun today at the Queen Bee.

Thank you more....for making the to die for chicken mango curry sandwiches.

I was happy to work on these orphan blocks ..stay tuned..

I can either do a wall hanging or back it in children's fabric for a baby quilt.

And good a good visit with friends. Time flew...

Nice to have a good, not crabby day:)
xxoo

Rachel Daisy saves the day

Just in the nick of time...came a package from Australia
and  my blogging friend, Blue Mountain Daisy
Rachel, you are the best.  How did you know that I was ready to bite off everyone's head ???
For here came my chocolate survival kit, changing the crab to the charm..Thank you!!

I have wanted this magazine the minute I knew that Rachel was featured...
Here it came..... in my international smile package...

She is my favorite quilt artist...Her work is as lovely as she is...Wahoo.!!!
.Now I do not have to wait in line to get it!!!!

And....too..here we are ....a book for the kids!!!  So sweet..we read it tonight.

 And tissues to dry my tears...with Australian money...ha!! ha!! ha!!

You have so brightened my day.

If I could only concentrate on the gratitude...and not the tears...
You have no idea how much this package meant to me today.
Indeed, it was perfect timing:)
xxoo

My day of serenity..and sleep

Who I have become..is a question...????
Nothing needed here for interpretation!!!!
My cat tin says it all...and with a smile!!

 This picture I have had since undergrad school....like years...I save everything:).
.I thought it looked like my grandmother who helped raise me....
A few years back.I finally made it into a bag using the screen from the screened in porch, other mesh and clear vinyl from Walmart.
Hello..now it reminds me of myself...Lord help me!!

.Had a great day.
Just turned the phone to texting only to weed out the drama  Sigh...
My five year old grand...had a wild day Friday at camp in all the sun and fun.
After a great sleep, he woke up quite himself....
 and was thrilled to spend the day at Auntie Charmaine's house.
Thank you dear sister...I know you are not well...but you are the best in my book.
You knew I had made plans this weekend for much needed widow respite...and you came to the rescue..again...again..and again...I am blessed with a sister I can always count on...
.I owe you both lunch and fabric from Faust when we go.....yes!!!!
xxoo

I am relaxing by sleeping and working on 100 projects at once. I found these orphan blocks in some random bag and could not resist putting some together.
I cannot seem to make my thank you presents nor can I seem to write my thank you notes.
But I can sew random things.

Grief brings with it such fatigue and sleeplessness...trying to rise above it all.
Katie..you win this week's good friend award!!  Thank you for helping me wrap my head around which  beds to get for Evan's new room and all the tutoring that help him soar.
 Now I just need to find a way to get to IKEA for the beds.

Thank you to Em and Bri for painting his new room in spite of all the chaos..
After a wonderful marriage of 37 years..I now find myself having to do both sides of
 the household work load .....some for sure not in my skill set!
All while I miss him so...
Crazy brings back the dizziness of the concussion...
 Marie sent Doyle to fix the freezer.and my sewing chair...
My cup runneth over.with friends.

Gratitude..
It gets me through the sad times.

A Scrappy Good Day

The other day, stress drove me to this bag:
  It was full of addictive substance.......strips of fabric.

Naturally it had been organized by Kristen, the babysitter..

.(miss you Kristen)  I could never be this organized...

Anyway, I just started pulling 2.5 inch strips and sewing them together..

.sigh...let the relaxation begin.

I ended up here...with random four patches..to save for a rainy, industrious day.

But, I could not let it be...you know how it goes...

Last night I did this.

Now, I was really having a good time and I remembered  the Lori Holt pattern that was way too easy..

I made these cuties...from 4.5 inch squares and some more of the 2.5 inch squares for the corners.

Did I stop....oh, no I did not....

Just now, I did this....:)

Quilting is my meditation!!!!

My Life as a Quilty Hoarder and other Personal Stories

So be it....

Today's First good story at O'Quilts

My Melanoma story...or as my world turns.  How it started:

Dylan went by ambulance to the ER from Urgent Care with his bee sting.

I took pictures of Dylan  looking so cute on the stretcher.

I had a very large cyst on my back right where I could not see it.

My sister took a picture with my phone of the cyst so I could admire it.

The last day of school, I was showing the school nurse the adorable pictures of Dylan on the stretcher.

She scrolled too far on the phone photos and saw the gory picture of the cyst on my back.

Oh, no..she cried...that is Mersa..You have to go to the dermo..pronto.

She scared me to death, so I made the appt the next day.

Dermo guy took off the cyst and the new black mark on my shoulder for the lab.

The cyst came back as nothing and the new black mark came back Melanoma.

Happenstance is the motto of this story...and, of course good luck.

Today, the lab called...I am cancer free...no more bad boy Melanoma.

Celebration means Fabric...!!!

And dear sweet Cousin Ann sent me a wonderful gift cert to Fabric.com.

I think I will save that one until I am very very very depressed.

I love you Cousin Ann!!!

Second good story at O'Quilts

My friend Byrd came to visit yesterday. I have not seen her in 21 years or so.
We had lunch and then she came to see my quilts. We were in quilting groups together in Miami.
A lovely time..just lovely.
She brought me her fabric and thread scraps.
I love you Byrd!

I am trying to decide my purpose today.  I have a few hours free.
Idle hands are the work of the devil...guess that is it cuz all I want to do is to sit in my recliner and read quilting magazines and doze off...Should I yield to temptation or should I not???

My Emotional Kingda Ka

A very very tough weekend for me.
But, on their own...helpers came...throwing off high heels for the real deal.

 It between the emotions, I made a few more blocks with my dear man's shirts.

Here is one of the seam rippers he used to make for me in his wood working shop.

 With need for a distracting purpose, I grabbed my drawer of 2.5 inch strips..and made easy four patches.
Soothing..No dent at all in the stash.

With my fabric links back in place...I noticed..of course I did...

Equilter having a 4th special with free shipping...
OMG...they have the worst shipping prices..
 Since my sister was hospitalized,
I decided that being a fabric junky was better than any other kind of junky...
I ordered...An hour or so of relaxation while everyone was sleeping...

My dear man forgive me..since it is our first July 4th without each other.
Not that fabric fixes it...but relaxation is better than hysterics.
Everyone is on vacation this weekend.  I do not blame them.
 Drenna, I love you forever for including Evan  in your big family celebration..
 Thinking of me during this so tough time with my sister in the hospital...and  all.
......is quite your dash..to heaven!!
My sister is now out of the hospital.  This week she has to go to the gastro guy and swallow a little camera..
This week I should hear if my Melanoma is gone.
This week I have a special visitor...I have not seen in 20 some years...so excited.
Our very own Byrd!!

Figuring it all out on Independence Day

Happy Fourth of July
Gratitude!!
Especially as I see how my grandchildren flourish in safe harbor.
Two steps forward, one step back. Still worth a great celebration.

Tuesday I will be 3 months a widow.  When will I die of my broken heart??

After I find out if my Melanoma is gone?

After I find out if my sister is ok?  

After I deal with all of the trauma issues of my grandchildren?

After I grieve for my mother?

After I grieve for my son the junky?

After I clean out the closet of my dear man?