Tuesday, November 4, 2014

The Stabilizer

Lynsey has been invited to her first friend birthday party.  A six year old in her class has invited the entire class to a craft party at a store.  The children in the elementary school are mostly from well financed families.  Sometimes I feel that the children have so much, that there is nothing I could get them...so I made her a bag.
The stabilizer.  I used to machine applique from the seat of my pants kind of way.  But, I have converted to a stabilizer.  I like the wash-a-way..just put it in the sink for a few and it has all evaporated.  Our Lynsey approves of the present.
 It is just a funky bag for a 6 year old...Important features..."Frozen" fabric, name on it, little pockets inside and Lynsey approves.
Someone I know goes to the beach for half of her life.
Even though this is a Halloween boat, I think the sea is stable..I mean candy corn:)??? Really?
I was going to be clever as clever could be and name this post the Stabilizer because I just knew Mr.O'Quilts was stable...at what level(:  but still stable.

But then, the Hospice doctor and his team made a home visit today :) 
 Why do people not just leave me alone in the land of denial??.
  I have told you before, it is my favorite vacation spot. 
 But, oh, no....I need to be told all the grisly details of what just could be coming down the pike.
I am told that 60% of ALS patients with feeding tubes aspirate and it is down hill after that.  Do I really need to know this??  And, I was told that there are no answers to ALS.  It could go quickly or plateau.
His insides are paralyzed just like his outsides...ugh  This makes bathroom an issue.
He will now be on a 24 hour morphine patch for his breathing.
Good things...
He has a great Hospice team.
He has no pain.
His eyes are still blue.
The Ativan and morphine and sleeping medication are working.  He is mostly awake in the day watching television.  He is still weak and unable to chat, but I will take that as long as he is home.
 The CNAs are way worth the trillions of dollars that I pay them.
Now who is not stable???   I wonder!!
It is a huge effort for me to be stable and not look for the next trauma...just to stay in the day.
A huge effort.
Who helps me along??  YOU.
Thank you for the comments, for the love, for the support, for your words and your gifts, for the fabric, for the gift cards, for taking the kids on outings, for the money in the fund raiser, for the food on my front porch, for setting up Take Them A Meal  again...so we do not have 3 meals at once on the porch.
  Thank you for fixing my car and moving furniture, for doing the yard, for the emails and cards and coming to quilting.  Thank you for taking the kids to karate and helping with homework and doing errands.
How can I thank you???  enough??
I can't.
Guess I will just have to play it forward someday when I am able.


Peggy Boltes said...

Hearts and love.
Maybe we are all paying it forward!

Karen E said...

That will be the best present at the party and one the little girl will remember. I made a simple Jedi cape one year out of fleece for one of Sam's friends and put the boy's name on it. He still talks about it years later. What a wonderful grandmother you are!!!

ES said...

I'm glad you are getting helping hands!! The bag looks ace - especially the frozen fabric!! I just know my daughter would love it!

Rachaeldaisy said...

A personalised bag is worth all the barbies in the world! I love the Halloween boat!! It's good to hear Mr isn't in pain and has a great hospice team. Hugs to you all as always.

Barb said...

what a cute bag for Lilly!
Fun sailboat on a candy corn sea.
The truth is difficult, but does help prepare us for the hard things. Sorry to hear you got more bad news.
So glad he's not in pain -

beth said...

Do you have the Take them a Meal link? I'd love to sign up. Thankful that your man is stable just now. Praying for you, friend.

Alcea Rosea 31 said...

The bag is brilliant, lovely personal touches make it very special. Hugs.

catspec said...

That bag is just so sweet. You are so talented. The fact that you took the time to do this with your husband so ill is really showing how good you are. I think the bag is professional and so sweet for a little girl!

Michele Bilyeu said...

You are so loved. I think of you and I see the goodness if your heart and the pure shiningness of your deepest soul and most high flying spirit. Your man will soar free soon enough and fully see the illusion of this silly and often horrible earthbound life. But for now it is this sharing of yourself that touches me to my core with love and respect. Hugs hugs hugs

Holee said...

Once again I've been missing with trying to set up my hip surgery...but you and your's are never far from my mind and prayers.