Wednesday, April 13, 2016

So Scrappy Bad

Every quilt group I go to, I bring my little blue machine and I work on this scrap quilt.
I had a big box of 1.5 inch strips.  Monday at the Queen Bee group, I finished them all.
The next day I sized them and ironed them and started to play with them

Good thing I had this distraction.  Because..the doo doo hits the fan and I cannot stop it.
I have lost my mind twice in 3 years..Once at the pharmacy when I cried and cried and no one could console me
That was last year.  My buddy from Vietnam, the bagger had to hug me and go inside the grocery store and apologize for me.
This past weekend was the second...I cried and lamented and shut myself in the house for two days with the blinds shut as I over reacted to a school issue...Like I said last time, my Pinata broke open and it was quite a bit more stuff coming out than the school..apologies all around as I recovered.
Today is not good either.
I am just back from a 2 hour appt with the ortho guy...knee replacement scheduled June 20
Evidently it is a big deal.  My knee is so bad that my leg is bowing.
If I do not do it...Bad
If I do do it...Bad
Tomorrow is the one year anniversary of the death of my Mr.O'Quilts.
I am a baby with medical things.
He is not here to hold my hand.  I have to suck it up.  Not my style.
There is no chocolate in the house.
Bad, very Bad.
Did I say BAD

1 comment:

smazoochie said...

I think everyone deserves a meltdown from time to time. You've been holding yourself so tightly for so long, it is bound to happen. Maybe it is part of healing? If your loved ones forgive you, then you should forgive yourself, too.
I'm sorry you will face your joint replacement without your partner. You won't be alone, you will have lots of love & support, just not the love & support your heart desires.